if you love someone or have someone close to you who has borderline personality disorder, you do learn some of the ways the disorder can cause dysfunction in the affected individual’s life, and those around them. and so validation is a really key part of that.” if you have a sibling with bpd, you may feel fear around setting up boundaries, worrying that the very act of doing so will cause your sibling to react negatively. “demonstrating limits with curiosity, with kindness can really clear up a lot of the worry that some individuals with bpd have when boundaries are set.” watson adds it’s important to state what the intention is behind the boundaries.
you may struggle to be clear in a way that makes them feel heard and you feel good. you need to sit with the discomfort of disappointing them. a self-soothing or grounding technique that i can walk you through?’” advises watson, adding “focusing on the process versus the content of what they’re saying is really important.” “sometimes people treat those with bpd like pariahs. reflect individually without getting to blows on the specific item.” watson adds that, when your sibling sees you don’t react strongly to their emotions and throw fuel on the fire, they can see “this person is safe.
ways of relating that unfold in the present and that aren’t layered with deep intra-psychic pain – pain that is unresolved. it can often be sudden and seem to come out of nowhere because the source of it is deep inside the psyche of the borderline. the very thing that you most want from your borderline (or wanted if you’ve left the relationship) in terms of what it means to have a relationship and to relate was not ever even on the table because the borderline is not an emotionally/psychologically mature being. that dance was a complicated punishing and unforgiving dance of codependency through which i sought to resolve what for years seemed like the unresolvable woundedness that was the source of my rage and the abuse that i perpetrated against others in the name of trying to actually be psychologically born which is necessary in order to get on and stay on the road to recovery. this is the most stigmatising, ignorant rubbish i have ever read. the more i tried to love, protect and be the person that i thought she wnted me to be was never enough and triggered her pull/push behavior. i have written an article that, although is not an opposing viewpoint, is written from the other perspective as the husband of a bp wife. i think this is the most clear and well written article for what i have experienced at times with my partner. and i tried so hard for years to be perfect and saintly. i have another boyfriend and he lied to me about previous partners. i hate myself for telling him the things i do, i never hit him after that one time i couldn’t take it anymore but it still haunts me. it can start with determination and prayer to be guided in the right direction. i have extreme feelings of guilt bcz i love my wife and never want to hurt her, but this wonderful woman & this unfortunate disorder so took me down a road – i’ll never be the same. he would call me names and hit me but if i retaliated in any way there was something wrong with me or i was the abusive one. he did not have a car and would use my car and threaten to leave me in places. i’m still afraid of him and he said i would likely get a criminal record and never have the career i want. she says that she is preserving her and it will be her terms or not at all..do i see it thru…does this pass and can she just cut me off in her heart like that this article describes an personal experience with a bpd and states that not all bpd’s abuse in the same way. she trained me to never have feelings or needs because i felt guilt for having them and i feared the consequences. she used to tell me that i was the abusive one. i finally told her to go away and leave me alone a couple weeks ago.
one of the many hard parts of this disorder is to see and admit our abusiveness. divorcing my wife of 3.5 years very shortly i love her and can’t stand her all in the same breath. he works around me daily….so i just don’t get that aspect of bpd….. i’m torn to pieces as i still love him and feel so horrible,… in a few months the temporary orders are up…. i realise that my self esteem is non existent and that i and the children have been mentally abused and controlled all the time. i am now faced with dealing with a wreck of man who is trying to return but even this changes daily. i am with a bpd wife and it’s really hard. if this is a disease, then i have an obligation and a responsibility as her husband to look after her. a i think one of the lingering questions for me was this: does she really have bpd? i would never dream of hurting another person and it would make me anxious even to yell. i think it is incredibly important to also look at why and how bpd develops. as sometime who has dealt with this for years, i can tell you that the last thing i have ever wanted is to hurt another person. the sky is not blue and you are a liar ! i am married to a borderline, and to say the least it has been a rodeo. see a borderline can not deal with the death of some one close to them. the person that i am presently with has bpd and doesn’t even know it yet. i know the good parts of him and how this monster is only a false identity. the mother bit really stood out to me, she struggles to have a good relationship with my mother and just recently got on good terms with hers. her mother is a saint and i struggle to imagine her causing any sort of abandonment issues. i like to think i’m a responsible parent and do my share of raising our kid so usually what she is angry over is something i’ve done out of good intentions. so if anyone is reading these comments and starting to get worried i hope my post here gives some hope.
a borderline sibling can often be what they call the golden child. there is usually a scapegoat. those get set up by a dysfunctional parent, sometimes also bpd, both probands and sisters reported similar prevalence of intrafamilial abuse, although bpd patients reported more severe physical and emotional abuse. bpd borderline personality disorder (bpd) is highly associated with verbal abuse, emotional abuse, psychological abuse, physical abuse,, growing up with a sibling with borderline personality disorder, how to interact with sister with borderline personality disorder, sibling with borderline personality disorder reddit, borderline personality disorder danger to others.
of course, not every abused or neglected child develops bpd, and many patients who have the disorder were never sexually or physically abused. i wanted to save the children i love more than anything from the abuse i my sister has a personality disorder called borderline personality disorder. it means, that if you choose to continue to be in the relationship with this person that you will most likely be emotionally abused, if not even, my brother has borderline personality disorder, older sister with bpd, older sister with bpd, borderline personality disorder family dynamics, bpd sister no contact, how to deal with a parent with borderline personality disorder, histrionic personality disorder sister, how to communicate with someone with borderline personality disorder, symptoms of borderline personality disorder, bpd sister-in-law, how to motivate someone with borderline personality disorder.
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